So today has been an interesting day, as I had the day off, and accomplished many things that I had to complete, however the day was filled with a few disappointments that threw my moods for interesting loops.
I was under the impression that our engine was not going to go off forest until the latter part of this week, but such was not the case. Our engine was called to the Plumas National Forest, and because I was not working today, I got left behind...it's just simply the luck of the draw, and I have to deal with this..easier said than done, as the word brought me to tears.
I was so excited to go out on another tour, and then wam..it was if a large-sized board hit me in the face.
I had a myriad of emotions, thoughts and moods wash over me, and I knew it was up to what I did with my thoughts...do I surrender my will, or not? I must see this as a part of God's wonderful plan..and simply take refuge in that truth, but holy night is that hard..especially when life recently has been a rollercoaster...gee, the money would have been nice, as my car decided to kerplop on me, and now I am in the process of car shopping. Anyhoo, the complaintes could continue, and I could continue in my sob story.
I am choosing not to remain in this mire of self-pity, and surrender my will unto God's will. Tonight, as I was watching the stars in the sky and praying...I know the Lord was saying, "Thy will, not yours." God's plan in this is so much greater than I can ever imagine, and I must hold onto this, for my sanity.
I am tired, and the days will continue, and something good will come of this..this is only a test in the submission of my will unto my loving King. He knows best.
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3 comments:
What a bummer! So does that mean no work until they get back...or do you work, just not out on a tour earning extra $$? And the car thing on top of that!? Way to surrender -- look forward to maybe hearing the good things that come of this time.
Yeah, I am still working, which is good--just not the extra money, but I will be able to complete some fire prevention hours with a really rad lady that was a Tahoe Hotshot..super badass hotshot crew, and she is great. The Lord is at work and, thankfully, the surrender is coming more naturally..yet another situation in which I am powerless.
Hello friend. I just wanted you to know I'm thinking of you and loving you. I hope you've been able to enjoy this time somewhat, even though it must have been SO frustrating to miss that opportunity. You are a rockin' super woman and I love you!
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