The only existence I feel is one of dread and remorse, for I have lost touch with myself, with God, and with others. I looked in the mirror and did not want to recognize the woman staring back at me..lifeless, joyless, an empty tomb--A chasm exists between myself and the lover of my soul. Why Oh Lord, when I need you most, does Your presence escape me? I try to hold onto your precious Word--promises that you will never leave or forsake me, and that you will deliver me. I fear the worst has come upon me, where doubt and unbelief cloud and darken my vision of Your truth. I have learned to surrender my feelings and circumstances at the foot of the Cross, and I will continue to stand and trust in the only thing that is eternal---You and Your Holy Word!
Oh Loving God, come now to rescue me, for I have lost the will to live. I cannot utter breath without these meds, yet they might as well be my enemy. Whatever I need to live a joyful existence, please bring it now! For I cannot bear another breath of pain, confusion, and emptiness. Come now to fill me with the power and inspiration of Your Truth! Oh God, reinstate life into every inch of this soul!
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About Me
- Deidre
- "No one is as capable of gratitude, as one who has emerged from the kingdom of night."
2 comments:
what depth of truth... its like reading my own journals... He will breathe life into your soul... He will not deny you when you seek Him with all your heart. "Desert seasons" are horrible... but they do not last forever. This is a time of continual reliance on the One who loves you most, whether you see Him, hear Him, or feel Him. He is there. Breathe and be still and know that He is God. Look up the song "Desert Song" by Brooke Fraser. It spoke so much to me, and I think you will identify.
Wow, very powerful and expressive. Seeing that this is an example of how you think and feel is awesome; thanks so much for letting read your thoughts, as you think, ponder and almost pray things out in written format. I suppose in many ways it reminds me of the way I think and feel, most of such things I write down in a journal--yet you do so out in the open for all to read and enjoy. It's an honor and humbling at the same time as one reads your deep thoughts and longings of your heart and soul. Your words are encouraging to me, I'm left speechless.
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